Mahabali - The Maha Giver

“You give but little when you give of your possessions.

 It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” – Khalil Gibran

Festivities come and go each year, but for every individual, it has different significance year after year. We in our journey towards making a difference, we touch many people’ lives, we gather new insights, we learn and unlearn many lessons and we search within for many answers. As the world is paused by this pandemic, we recharged ourselves, re-scripted, and redesigned ourselves and embraced the new ways of life. We are waiting for yet another Onam to come. An Onam which is going to be much more than getting up early, visiting the temple and eat purely vegetarian Onam Sadhya.

               As we all know Onam represents and evokes a sense of plentitude and prosperity. It is a festival to commemorate the homecoming of our beloved king Mahabali from the Patalalokham. So, the legend goes this way. Mahabali, the Asura king unlike his peers was a benevolent and generous King. Mahabali also through trickery had consumed the eternal nectar amritham, which gave him immortality. With his valour, he captured heaven and earth. Green with envy, the Gods approached Lord Vishnu, who used the strategic plan to trap Mahabali. He incarnated as a dwarf brahmin, Vamana and approached Mahabali for alms, in the form of three steps of land. The generous King Mahabali immediately agreed to it, upon which Vamana metamorphosed into Trivikrama or giant form. In two steps he covered the whole of earth and heaven and did not have a place to keep his third step. Mahabali offered his own head for the third step. Thus, he was pushed to the nether land. Acceding to the request of Mahabali, Vamana granted him a boon whereby he could return to his beloved subjects once every year. And this day is celebrated as Onam.

               The story or legend or the myth can be interpreted in many ways, but it is upon us how we take it and relate it to our current scenarios and situations. Taking the essence from the story, we can elucidate Vamana’s three steps into a wider meaning. The first step where he measures the earth is indicating the human beings to look around and be humbled by the sheer number of other living beings like us on this earth. The second step of measuring the skies is an indication for us to look up into the sky and be humbled by the vastness and multitude of the universe and cosmos, and to feel how insignificantly menial we are in this universe. The third step, on Mahabali’s head, is the realization of our personal existence. If we place our hand on our head we realize that in this cycle of births and deaths, the time-span of each of our lives is a short span, and the role we play in this cosmos is even smaller.

               Mahabali is an embodiment of the virtues we possess in each one of us. Mahabali can be personified as the sacrifices, benevolence, kindness, selflessness. This is the time to bring out the Mahabalis inside us out. During this Covid-19 pandemic, we have seen the sacrifices the health front liners have made. Even when keeping a safe distance physically let’s come closer to heart by helping our fellow beings, the lesser fortunate ones. Let us all be the Mahabali, the ‘Maha Giver” and bring the pride of sharing.

A Letter To My Daughter : On her Eleventh Birthday

  

Dear Daughter,

 

When you are turning eleven today, with you, I am also turning 11 in this journey of motherhood.

 

I can still picture your journey inside me, the fear I experienced for both of us. I don't remember the moment you were born nor did I see you for another two days, but the moment I saw you, your image stamped right here on my heart and my mind.

 

You were just the way I imagined you to be... I have it all memorized… the round nose, the curly hair, the sweetness of your smile...all.

 

My ‘shy lil girl’ is morphing into one confident young lady with a far more sense than I was dreaming of. You are both confident and stubborn, intelligent and witty, bold and very beautiful, kind and too curious… and yet still aware that there is so much more to learn...(I can't deny the fact that you know much more than what I knew at your age😉)

 

Your lovely giggles, those major tantrums, the hormones that are just beginning to surface🤨 giving me a mixed gush of emotions,  but I know you are meant to keep growing, journeying into a young girl and then eventually a young woman you will become... Each baby step you are taking along this path is helping you build the character that will captain you in your adulthood and beyond. I am lucky to witness it, to learn from you and to have a hand in guiding you along the way...

 

Diu, as you turn eleven today, I have a few hopes and wishes for you...

 

Always keep smiling - your heart and your laughter will set your path. You will comfort your friends who are having a tough time, and you will remind yourself that you are in charge of picking up and starting over and you have the ability to make a stranger’s day.

 

Remember that losing is never a bad thing. When you lose…. a game, or a test, or a friendship, you are given the opportunity to learn and grow...and this is a part of life.

 

There are only so many things in life we can control. The older you get, the more you realize how important it is for you to compare yourself only to YOU. If you want to improve yourself, be a better self of you than that you were yesterday, not better than your neighbour, or your friend or even us(your parents) for that matter. 

 

Be carefree and confident like your dad. All days can't be bad, the best ones are yet to come. This hope will help you keep moving.

 

You will never regret being kind. You have a beautiful heart, continue to share it...

 

Believe in magic, trust me this universe is full of magic that will awe you always. And be a dreamer like me, you know how much I love dreaming and even daydreaming.

 

Be Grateful. I trust this doesn’t need an explanation.

 

I always wanted both of us to be the best of friends… but our relationship is more or like Tom n Jerry, but I'm loving it.

 

Let me tell you something very important, no matter what your dad and I will keep loving you ever.

 

Happy, happy birthday

❤ Amma.

 

A Trip to Japan

 

“Sayonara sayonara…Kal phir aaungi sayonara” This song from the movie ‘Love in Tokyo’ where Asha Parekh wearing a kimono and holding a Japanese fan, is my earliest memory of Japan. Those days wherever you look you could find Japanese electronics gadgets. And for me, the most fascinating thing was the Japanese Gudiya, a doll which used to close and open its eyes. When you make the doll lie down it will close its eyes and when you keep it up straight it will open its eyes. It was the most magical thing I had seen ever in five of six years of my life. So, Japan as per my tiny six-year-old brain was very much a part of India.

                Coming to Kerala for vacations were always the happiest moments. Meeting the cousins, going to relatives’ places, going to beaches, rowing through the rivers, trekking to uncle’s house, climbing on the trees, everything was exciting.  So, this time we were coming from the remote North Eastern state Assam, where my father was posted. The journey in the train itself was so exciting. It takes five days and three changeover trains to reach my destination. Even after getting out of the train, you will feel the running motion of the train for one day.

                Along with my cousin’s, we climbed on trees, threw stones at neighbours’ windows, plucked flowers, and used to run away, call funny names to other kids and the list went so on. Our squad leader was the eldest cousin who stayed at Calicut only, and who was almost 10 years elder to us. All the above said things we did on his command. We got many punishments from our grandfather for these naughty things. He used to tell us stories and we were awed by his tales which included demons and vampires.

                Those days the neighbourhood was so known that even if we venture out three to four kilometres, all were known, people. Everyone would know us by our ancestral house name. Even the parents never cared where the kids have sneaked out, as they knew we would be safe.

                On one such fine day, the eldest cousin gathered all of us and asked us, “Have you all been to Japan?” We all shook our head no. He looked scornful at us as if we were menial beings as we have not seen Japan. He stood on a makeover podium and for the next fifteen minutes, he was explaining the beauty of Japan, how the people there are so hardworking etc. etc. We listened to him with our eyes and mouth open. And yes, we felt bad now for not being able to visit Japan till then. Then comes his announcement. He is going to take us to Japan. We were all excited and so thrilled. He said follow me. We walked behind him. We walked for kilometres and kilometres. Through small muddy pavements, across the lush green paddy fields, then rocky pathway and finally reached the end of the land. The land ended into a huge mass of water. The whole place looked magical. He said this is Japan. And we too were as proud as Columbus when he discovered America. We played there for some time and then returned home, feeling proud of our achievement. When we reached home, all the elders in the house were waiting for us to be back. Not seeing us for quite some time they searched for us around the neighbourhood. And not finding us anywhere around they were worried, so when we got back, we had to hear a series of scolding. But it didn’t matter to us as we had accomplished greater thing. And none of the elders paid heed to our mentioning that we went to Japan and back.

                Anyways for the next few years, we still believed where we went was the ‘Japan’. To add more to it on my return to Assam and going back to school, I told everyone that for vacation I had been to Japan. A few years later, when we grew up and the second set of cousins were of seven to eight years, we did the same with them. We took them to the same spot and told them, we are in Japan.

To end it up as someone said: "the journey matters more than the destination." Yes, the journey was a memorable one indeed!

An Erratum – The First Mistake in my Life

   

    What’s there in a name? Shakespeare wrote. Really?? Mr Shakespeare, you don’t know how many kids lost marks for spelling your name wrong as ‘Shakespere’ or ‘Shakesphere’? I am one among them.

So here goes the story of how a spelling changed my life.

Place: Delhi, the Capital city if India. It was going to be the most important day of my life; I was going to join a school for the first time. But apart from gaining an education that day my life was going to change my life upside down, I never knew. As usual, holding to my dad’s fingers, I was trotting towards the school, trying to catch up with his pace. As an army man, he believed every child was born perfect, so he was marching past fast expecting me the same.  

                Army kids were privileged to get admission in the central government-owned Kendriya Vidyalayas. So, walked into the Principal’s room and had a small discussion. My dad filled out the form and gave it to the Principal. He was checking out the form and he made few changes in it. And proudly announced as if he found some mistake, telling my dad he misspelt my spelling “I” instead of “e”. My dad did not understand at first, so the Principal showed him the correction he made on the application form. He Christianized me as “Hema” in that form. Then my dad told him no it was “Hima” as my dad had spelled it. But the proud Principal told that his daughter was Hema and he asked my dad is he not a fan of the famous Bollywood heroine and the dream girl of every Indian male then, Hema Malini? My dad who always had a chill pill attitude told him then let it be so. Thus, from Hima, I became Hema that day. Identity crisis in my life started that day. From a unique name, I degraded to a common name that day.

                So, the story behind naming me as Hima goes like this. As the custom goes, in my family it is the eldest Ammavan (uncle) who has the right to name the kids. It happens that my Ammavan had some craziness towards the letter H. All the names of kids in my tharavad began with H. Second in line it was my turn to be named. I was born in the beautiful Himalayas, on a snowfall November. Hence it was decided I will be Hima, yes indeed I was a kid as soft as snow.

                And here the Principal at KV No.1 Delhi changed me from snow to gold. Yes, Hema means gold in Sanskrit. My family and close friends call me by the name Hima. My documents, certificates and passport go by the name Hema. By the way, my husband too has a unique name, Idhayan. And people spell it wrong all the time. Same with my daughter Dia. In India, everyone adds one ‘y’ to her name.

“Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language” And yes, now I do remember what the Bard of Avon said, “what’s there in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”